Story Samples from Options' Staff

Examples of stories like those in the book:

Jean in her Hawaiian Element
by Anne Porter


One of the things I have to remind myself is to create the space to listen to the people we support at Options, to listen carefully to the verbal and nonverbal ways people communicate the things that are important to them - paying attention to behavior and patterns that help us understand a person's needs, preferences, and dreams. Much of our everyday work focuses on these attempts at understanding what people want to achieve in their lives.

In friendship, one person's success or triumph is experienced both by the person who achieves that triumph and by that person's friends. As support workers, we can experience the satisfaction of friendship when we can be involved in making a dream come true for someone. Though most of the assistance we provide often occurs around the most mundane decisions and efforts of everyday life, it is this stable backdrop of support that can make possible the golden moments where dreams can be pursued and fulfilled.

When Jean, who is in her late sixties, first hinted at having a secret wish to visit Hawaii, it was quite hard for me to imagine supporting her outside the environment of her apartment and neighborhood. When I first met Jean, her live-in roommate was a doctor. Her next roommate, who has lived with her for about five years, was a nurse. Because of Jean's cerebral palsy, her care is highly routinized and often revolves around some personal care needs which might be considered medical needs. Her room is full of medical paraphernalia. She has a cabinet full of chux pads, depends, creams and lotions. Her attendants use a hoyer lift and a hospital IV type of bag to dispense her midday feedings through her G tube. She has a hospital bed, bedpan, wheelchair, communication board, hearing aid, all kinds of pads to support her in her chair, and even special swabs for applying mouthwash or for antibiotic creams. There are pills she needs to take in the morning, special ways to prepare the food for meals she takes orally. And because Jean is unable to communicate through words, most of this information must be passed on from worker to worker.

In addition, perhaps for the sake of consistency, Jean has a very structured day. She has a set bedtime and waking time, a set nap time and meal times which rarely vary. Probably many of her routines come from living at a nursing home for many years after moving out of the home of her parents. It was to this routine and medical paraphernalia which I was introduced upon my first introduction to Jean, and it was hard for me conceptually to separate the two.

For me it was quite liberating to see Jean outside of this familiar environment. To sit beside her on the airplane, with all the other passengers, erased out differences and made us equals in a way I had never experienced before. To see her sleeping in a hotel bed instead of a hospital bed, with the moon shining in through the window, the sound of the waves and a gentle wind blowing in, and the door leading out on the lanai wide open - no worry about whether Jean might catch a chill - was immensely liberating.

Over and over again, my mind had opportunities to stretch and see Jean's support in new ways. I wish we could have moved back to Madison the very accessible bus system, the weather, the great people, the Hawaiian music and dance that Jean very much enjoyed, and the Hawaiian language which is mainly comprised of vowels that Jean can form. Jean was truly in her element. For me to see Jean in this context was to learn to see her genuine Jeanness, her true self. It was illuminating and something I am very thankful for.

Anne Porter, 1997


My Challenge

While writing this story I am trying hard to remember everything I learned about centering from Kathy and Vida. I am trying to remember the reasons I tell my friends I love my job. I am looking for away to get though the next four hours...

Sara is a challenge to me.. Isn't that the PC word for someone who stretches us to the length and breath of our leanings, our selves. The word challenge inspires visions of inner growth... Growth hurts... Now I am feeling those growing pains. This is a much better metaphor than the former "difficult". Difficult is the person's fault.. It implies blame. A "challenge" is an opportunity.

My opportunity today was to better learn how to handle conflict. Anger is not a comfortable emotion for me... Extremely uncomfortable as a matter of fact. It comes in random spurts, then gushes out unheeded by logic or propriety. My job is to do what she needs/wants to get done. I brace myself for her rage. I breathe, I rationalize, I draw boundaries, I put on my best "therapy face". The face cracks under the weight of her words. I put the face back on. This is my job. I think about how helpless and scarred she is. Her cry for help tumbles out in harsh words and accusations. My job is to see beyond and beneath them. Sometimes I feel like I am tricking her into helping herself.

Laura Gates
October 1998


MONEY, MONEY, MONEY
(Or, Money, That's What I Want)


So, it's 10:00 PM and still no story. What should I write about? Hmm . . . As I watch the Knicks play the Spurs in the pro basketball championship, I am reminded again about the outrageous salaries these athletes earn per season. Now, I'm about the biggest sports fan around, as many of you know. But watching people playing a fun game throughout the year while earning between $1/2 million and $10 million is a little disconcerting (especially with three months off in the summer). Also, I just heard that Bill Gates may be the first person ever to be worth one trillion dollars in a couple years. Movie stars are commanding up to $25 million per picture. And our agency is talking about cutting a few thousand dollars here or there, cuts that will affect the daily lives of the people we support in important ways. Intrusive monitors that invade people's privacy in their own homes? A reduction of valuable HSW time? No coffee in the waiting room? Let's see Bill Gates try to build his computer empire on no coffee. I realize these situations come from complex economic theories, like the huge savings of $150 per year in property taxes for Wisconsin residents. So where am I going with this story? I guess that I think money is distributed in a very strange way in this country, and a disproportionate amount of people enjoy the vast wealth that this country offers through no fault of their own. And unfortunately, people with disabilities seem to fall into that category.

Josh Enslin
June 1999


Saturday Night

Saturday night rain. I walk from the Union to the bus stop at the bottom of State Street. A Metro driver told me which bus I should take to go down Atwood. He was wrong, but I do not know that yet. I hurry under the shelter out of the rain. There were Terry Riddle and Matt Scholtes, returning home from the Isthmus Jazz Festival. Also, two fresh-faced college students, holding Bibles, were doing their best to influence a young woman waiting for the bus.

Matt welcomes me into the shelter. Terry looks like he's ready to be home. Matt says they were out late last night and Terry had a lot of fun, but tonight the jazz had not impressed him. I think how good it is that Matt is in Terry's life. I notice a pamphlet on Terry's lap which appears to be compliments of the Bible kids.

I recognize the woman as Penny, someone Options supports. Matt says that just before I arrived she had firmly told the students she was not interested in hearing what they had to say, because she already knew the score on that one. But they persisted.

I stand with Matt and Terry. Penny does not recognize me. Matt and Terry do not know Penny. Four out of six people at the bus stop are somehow connected to Options, but we do not all know this.

Matt and I talk about the Jazz Festival. I hear Penny say, rather loudly, "I know God loves me and I know I'm going to Heaven!" The students are not so sure about this. "How can you be so sure?" they ask. Penny says, "I know because my God is a loving God, that's how I know."

Matt looks at the map. We talk about the bus routes and schedules. I have already spent more time at this bus stop than it used to take me to get all the way home from here with the old system. The wholesome students are smiling, looking sincerely happy to have this opportunity to teach someone what is needed to get into Heaven.

If this were an argument, Penny would be winning. She occasionally looks over to the three of us with an expression that says, "Is it just me, or does anyone else see that these two are not getting anywhere with me?" Penny could easily end this once and for all by yelling at them to get lost, or by simply ignoring them. But she is determined to stand firm, and they don't have a chance with her. Penny has faith. They do not have anything to offer her that she lacks. I am hoping they're learning something from her.

A bus comes and Matt, Terry, and I board. The driver tells me I should have taken another bus, the one the previous driver had told me not to take. An image comes to mind of that other driver and I picture him locked in a room with the two college students we just left.

I say good-bye to Terry and Matt at the Square, hop off, and wait 20 minutes for the bus I should have been on 30 minutes ago. While I wait, I think of Penny, how in her lifetime she has likely been closer to both Heaven and Hell than the two students, and I think that makes her a little wiser on the subject. And riding home, I hear Penny's voice saying "I know God loves me." And I realize that without knowing it, the driver who gave me the wrong information did me a favor, because if I had gotten on the right bus, I would have missed out on a lot.

Peter Leidy
October 1998


Stories about Our Work

Story writing has become a regular part of the process of reflection and learning for staff at Options. Sometimes responding to assigned or suggested topics, sometimes written during a timed writing exercise at a staff meeting, the purpose of story writing is to allow time for staff to slow down and reflect about their experience as a support worker. What are we learning? What are we struggling with? Stories are a way to help us understand ourselves, each other and work in different and deeper ways. Story writing encourages the writer and the listener to learn from our past experiences. We believe that this process of reflection is essential to our ability to provide quality support services.....

We encourage you to try your hand at story writing. We have found that there must be an expectation that EVERYONE will participate, and the time needs to be set aside and protected from the pressures of everyday work. So, start writing......see what works for you and what you learn from the experience.

back to Publications page...